This time of year is so special in the Valley.  The leaves changes, subtlety by day, and then suddenly they are gone, and the cold breeze blows in with winter upon us.  Another season in New York State to mark the changes of our lives and upcoming seasons and holidays.  As gift-giving season approaches this year, we search for traditions and normalcy, while also adapting to the current state of the universe and the challenges put before us.  With changing generational goals in mind, I love bringing the holidays back to true symbols and real meaning.  There is nothing great in forced gifts that cause stress. Stress in the buying, the getting, the overwhelming mass of children’s toys and “things” that accumulate.  With the environment in mind, what joy does a plastic toy made in China and fueled from overseas really bring?  When I think of that sad little toy sitting in a landfill for my kids and grandchildren to deal with someday in the future, what are we really giving?  And even the Roblox and electronics … hate to break snow-globes, but the data centers running our internet and online usage is leaving a massive carbon footprint in addition to the electronics and how they are made.

Yes, it is true Amazon is a real temptation in my life and so is the pressure to over-buy. But for years, I look at these dolls and toys that end up in bins or stuffed in closets like “Toy Story” moments.  Not only do I wonder what goes on when the light goes out and if Woody and Barbie are on missions to save the new My Little Ponies; but I wonder if Marie Kondo would appreciate the HOURS of time I have spent organizing and decluttering.  She would not appreciate the stress that these things bring as she famously asks, “How much joy does this bring you?

 I know my three girls have enough toys that would last generations and it feels so gluttonous and wasteful in so many ways both physically and mentally.

But then the reality of gift-giving challenges this and the years of conditioning that this is what the season of giving is about.

I just wish we could ALL take a step back as parents, grandparents, loved ones and not feel the need to go into credit card debt over buying junk made overseas leaving a trail of unhappiness in every direction from how it was made to where it’s going to end up.

What if instead, we gave the gift of giving and thought that instead of things, “Presence is a Gift.”

Being together in meaningful ways; reaching out in the community in impactful and positive spirits.  Instead of overspending on Amazon, do fun local shopping!  Inexpensive or free outings, like walks and hikes. 

How about a donation in a loved ones’ name.  We have done gifts to the Warwick ASPCA to our kids and friends who love animals.  One of the warmest memories and traditions that I recently started with my big family is keeping the tradition of love and giving alive that my grandmother so gracefully had. My grandmother volunteered at Eva’s Village in Paterson, NJ for years and years, and well into her 90s.  Her and her friends and church group from St. Catherine’s in Glen Rock, NJ would bring clothes to the children at The Oasis, and some days cook or serve for the shelter at Eva’s Kitchen.  As a big family, we raise/raised money and donate in her name at Christmas time.  We also organized a volunteer day and served a hot meal at the kitchen and talk to the people who come in.  To be among cousins, aunts, uncles, and two of my girls in serving the community as my grandmother did for years was special and meaningful.

 “Giving Tuesday” is coming soon, on November 30, 2021 this year, beginning in 2012 with the message, “The tradition of giving, love, and spreading joy and peace is the true meaning of holiday seasons.  It GIVES true meaning to life.” https://www.givingtuesday.org/united-states/ .  On this day, some organizations will double donations.  Some banks like Bank of America do other promotions when you donate on this day so check out your bank too and see if they participate.

Everyone has something to give and every act of generosity counts. Ideas to think about, our local Warwick ASPCA; Church Groups; Giving to Local Families; Local Food Banks and Shelters; St. Jude; Red Cross, UNICEF ….. daily kind gestures, warm smiles, cleaning up public spaces, helping an isolated community member, friendly words ….

 

Let us make our Presence be Gifts!

Happy Holidays!

Jessica Sandfort